As 2012 comes to a close, I am left reflecting on all that has happened in the past twelve months.
I am thankful:
- For my daughters. I am in awe that God trusted in me enough to be their mother.
- For each of the 2,311 men and women on the One Mom’s Battle Facebook page. This community has been a lifeline for me and so many others. This forum has been a place of education, inspiration, tears, support and a great deal of love. The people on this forum understand what it is like to be a victim of NPD and we all have the ultimate goal of being labeled with the title of “survivor.”
- For the press that has been generated on the topic of Narcissistic Personality Disorder through outlets such as xojane.com, The Huffington Post, Examiner.com, Yahoo.com, Washington Times and more.
- For my latest title of “Huffington Post Blogger” and my first post to mark the end of the year: “Communicating With A Narcissist: Using The Narc Decoder“.
- For the experience that I have gained through my day job. Being able to make a living blogging, doing social media and public relations has given me the tools and expertise to bring this issue from the pages of my diary to the top media outlets around the world.
- That I was able to share my story, insight and experience with the world through my new book, “Divorcing a Narcissist“. I am thankful for the reviews that I have received so far and look forward to writing a companion book which will help others to examine their role in the toxic relationship which will help them to avoid making the same mistakes twice.
- For the new guest bloggers on One Mom’s Battle: “An Uphill Battle”, “Claire”, “A Whale of a Tale”, “Olivia”, “A Father’s Silent Scream”, “Thrown to the Wolf” and all of the other men and women who have shared their stories. There is power in numbers and our numbers are growing.
- For the personal growth and insight that I have experienced over the past year.
- That I will soon begin the next chapter of my life when I re-marry in the spring of 2013. I am content and happy in a healthy relationship that is filled with love, mutual respect, companionship and communication. I am thankful to be able to model such a relationship to my daughters.
I am hopeful:
- That the platform that has been built over the past year will allow for continued education. I firmly believe that keeping this topic in the media will educate the general public about narcissism. Our next generation of men and women need to be aware of the signs of NPD to avoid repeating the cycle. It will take all of our voices to be heard.
- That the Family Court System will begin to receive education on high conflict divorce and personality disorders. My goal is to get my book in front of as many Judges, Commissioners, attorneys, GALs, Parenting Evaluators and anyone else who has a hand in deciding the fate of a child. The children are dependent on US to be their voices in this battle.
- That the media will continue to shine the spotlight on narcissism and personality disorders.
What I have learned:
- That I can’t save everyone. Some of the stories that I hear are heart wrenching. My instinct is to try and help everyone but I can’t. Sometimes all I can do is offer words of wisdom and inspiration– I have learned that many times, that is all that is needed to give someone hope. A virtual hug is my go-to tool when I am left speechless.
- That being in the media spotlight brings forth “trolls”. I have learned that trolls are mean, bitter people and that nothing I say or do will change their mindset. I have learned that it is not worth my time or energy to try and explain my position to these online lurkers. Do you remember when you were first learning to give a speech in front of a group? We are taught to picture the audience naked in an attempt to bring forth humor and ease anxiety. I have learned to picture these “internet trolls” as scary little men who are sitting in a dark room and typing in their whitey-tighties with the eerie glow of the computer screen lighting up their little faces.
I am excited for 2013:
- To start the year with the honor of being featured as a Inspirational Luminary on InspireMeToday.com. I have followed this website for the past year and look forward to starting each day with the inspiration and wisdom of people such as Neale Donald Walsch, Guy Laliberte and Marci Shimoff. I am honored to be with such esteemed company and I look forward to sharing my feature with each of you!
- To be interviewed by Dr. Carole Lieberman, M.D. on “Dr. Carole’s Couch” on January 8, 2013.
- To have an established platform which will allow me to continue to speak out to the public, the media and the Family Court System.
I know that we are each in different places in this battle. Some have made it to the light at the end of the tunnel and others are straining very hard to see the slight flicker of a light. I beg you to keep putting one foot in front of the other no matter how difficult it seems. The children are depending on each of us to keep moving forward and to be their voice. Keep commenting when you see articles posted on Family Court or narcissism. Keep writing letters to your elected officials and keep speaking up.
- He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. – Isaiah 40:29-31
- He who has hope has everything. –Arabian Proverb
Sending you love, light and hope for 2013. Thank you for all you’ve given to me. Love, Tina
Click the link to purchase Tina’s new book, “Divorcing a Narcissist- One Mom’s Battle.” You will find insight, red flag reflections and strategies on how to survive (and thrive!) while divorcing of co-parenting with a narcissist. Tired of panicking at the site of a new email from the narcissist in your inbox? Learn how to decode the emails and see them for what they are. You will learn to forgive yourself and you will begin to heal.