I posted a personal ad.   Online.

I had a deep desire to form real friendships.  I had hundreds of “friends” but didn’t have real friendships.  My world while married was pretend.  One local newspaper article called us the “Golden Couple” during our entrepreneurial stint.  I felt like everything BUT the Golden Couple.  We had friends but it was what I refer to as “surface friendships”.  I was forbid to talk about anything “real”.  Our money issues, my health concerns or problems in our marriage…all topics that were forbidden.  I remember sitting at a dinner party one night and telling a group of friends that I had just been diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis– the car ride home was silent.  “He” could not believe that I would tarnish our perfect image.  From that point on, I kept my health issues to myself.   I kept all issues to myself.  I knew that our life was private.

I made a list of the 50 things that I wanted in a future partner…things that I would not “settle” on.  I read that list often.  At the time, I wasn’t looking for a relationship.  I was looking for a friend.  The list gave me hope for the future.

I placed an online ad.  I kept it very simple- no photo.  It started something like this:  I don’t want a relationship– seeking a friend for coffee, etc.  ….it was pretty basic- pretty simple.  I mentioned that I had children but also mentioned that they didn’t need a father– they had a father.  I also mentioned that they would not meet my children- for a long time…possibly never.

I went out on one coffee date in June with Glenn and the rest is history.  For over two years, I’ve had best friend…a partner in life…and I’ve been in love.  I’ve met someone who values my feelings and loves me for who I am.

He loves my every color and accepts me for who I am without trying to change me.

That online ad was the best decision I’ve made in years.  Glenn has restored my faith in men.

One Mom’s Battle: Our mission at One Mom’s Battle is to increase awareness of Cluster B personality disorders (Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder) and their impact upon shared parenting and the Family Court System which includes Judges, CPS workers, Guardian ad Litems (GAL), Parenting Coordinators (PC), Custody Evaluators, therapists and attorneys. Education on Cluster B disorders will allow these professionals to truly act in the best interest of the children.

History of One Mom’s Battle: In 2009, One Mom’s Battle began with one mother, (Tina Swithin), navigating the choppy waters of a high-conflict divorce in the Family Court System. Since then, it has turned into a grassroots movement reaching the far corners of the Earth. Tina’s battle spanned from 2009 – 2014 during which time she acted as her own attorney. Ultimately, Tina was successful in protecting her daughters and her family has enjoyed complete peace since October 2014 when a Family Court commissioner called her ex-husband a “sociopath” and revoked his parenting time in a final custody order.

Tina Swithin: Divorcing a narcissist? Tina Swithin’s books are available online at Amazon (print, Kindle or audio format). Each year, Tina offers life-changing weekends of camaraderie and healing at the Lemonade Power Retreat.  Tina also offers one-on-one coaching services and a private, secure forum called, The Lemonade Club, for those enduring high-conflict custody battles.

 

 

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