On Wednesday night, I took my daughters to see their therapist.  The girls bravely  discussed the events that took place on Saturday afternoon at their dad’s house.  My oldest daughter explained that she was trying very hard to hold her little sister’s head out of the water but in turn, her own head kept going under water.  It was difficult to listen to her talk about this event in detail.  She discussed trying to get her father’s attention and the fact that he was “either sleeping or not paying attention”.  The drowning facts that I have been researching kept flashing through my head as she was talking.  A small child can loose consciousness in as little as 12- 20 seconds.  I sat there while this brave little girl told her story but felt physically ill to actually picture the event as she was describing it.

In that moment, I wished more than ever that I could afford an attorney.  I would spend every penny that I own to hire someone to fight this battle for me.  It has now crossed over to a territory that terrifies me more than I could ever put into words.  I want to be my daughters’ advocate while they are living; not because I have lost them to a tragedy.

The girls are adamant that they want a supervisor to come with them to their dad’s house.  They love their father and they want to see their father but they don’t feel safe with their father.  My daughter has taken on a very grown up role and a responsibility that she shouldn’t have to bear: being her little sister’s protector.  I discussed the option of speaking to Minor’s Council with my 7-year old daughter this morning and at her level, I explained what his role is.  I then asked my daughter, “Do you want to talk to Mr. (Attorney) and let him know your feelings about everything?”.  “Yes, mom.  I do want to talk to him”, she responded.  I called the attorney’s office and we are going in this afternoon.

We have talked about “using our words and our voices” since she was 2 years old.

Today is the day that she gets to do that.

I hope they listen to this brave little girl.

 

 

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