Someone who is fairly new to my blog asked me if there is a place on my blog that would help her to understand why Narcissists use children as weapons. My short answer was that the majority of my blog details a Narcissist using my children as weapons. That is what Narcissists do– in every subject matter from the amount of custody to the amount of child support.
My X and the vast majority of Narcissists don’t care about the needs of their children– they care about how the child’s needs affects them. A real man would put his child’s needs above his own needs. My father was a single father and there were times that he slept on a couch so that I could have the only bedroom in our tiny apartment. Real men sacrifice for their children. Since the first day of our separation, my X has talked about “percentages”. Not “parenting time” but what percentage he has. In fact, in his first set of divorce paperwork, he did an actual “Profit & Loss Statement” on our daughters. Creating a “P & L” on two little girls should have given the Judge a glimpse into the type of person that we are dealing with. Red flags, anyone?
My X doesn’t care about how the lack of child support affects our daughters. He thrives on knowing that the lack of child support affects me. In his very sick and twisted mind, he needs to have control over my life and this is the only thing that he has left. I was surprised that he actually put his desire to take the girls to amusement parks this summer (complete with hotel stays) in writing. If he (or his mother) have the financial means to spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars on a summer vacation, you would think (?) that he would be inclined to help me purchase groceries? No, because he is a Narcissist. He likes using child support as a weapon.
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