Tina's Story

Divorcing a Narcissist: Seth Was Fired…Again

FiredI have suspected that Seth was terminated from his job a few weeks ago.  There have been some weird issues with his phone – he now calls from a private number and when I called his cell  phone…it was disconnected.  Since this was his work cell phone, it has been concerning.

This morning I received a call from our case manager at Child Support Services who verified my suspicions: Seth was fired from his job several weeks ago.

Truth be told, he managed to keep this job longer than most.  He usually has a 3 month lifespan on jobs since our divorce. He continued on his path of manipulation by updating his Facebook page on Sunday with his job title and company — the one that he was fired from weeks ago. I’m sure he is hiding his job loss from his family which has been his pattern with each job loss in the past.  I’m also sure that somehow it will be my fault that he lost his job.

The other portion of the phone call from Child Support Services was to notify me that the girls’ health insurance ends– effective TOMORROW.  This obviously affects us tremendously when it comes to the girls’ counseling sessions, dental check ups and other scheduled appointments.  I am so frustrated today.  Time to “pull up the big girl panties and deal with it”!

15 thoughts on “Divorcing a Narcissist: Seth Was Fired…Again

  1. If he can afford an attorney, he should be able to afford Cobra…in my opinion. I am not sure how it works– in regards to the courts.

  2. That’s worth looking into, Nicole. Thank you– I was told that Healthy Families is ending but I will give them a call.

  3. Tina, Big Girl Panties are definitely in order! My guess is you have a stash somewhere underneath the pile of parenting books, divorce books, NPD books, etc. Dig ’em out, Girlfriend! Sending Prayers and Hugs!

  4. Love those Big girl panties… That means you are taking care of business… I love it… I will so keep mines too as time is winding down for his return and let the games begin… I too am READY!… Funny how you said him losing his job will somehow be your fault … Amazing how alike these personalities are … It’s always my fault and he’s the reason I have anything in my life… Thank you so much Tina for sharing your stories… I don’t like the fact I have others in my same boat … However it’s comforting to know I am really not crazy!

  5. Thank you so much Tina for sharing your stories… I don’t like the fact I have others in my same boat … However it’s comforting to know I am really not crazy!

    I may re-post this on Facebook– exactly how I feel. Thank you!

  6. Oh my goodness! It must be part of NPD. My husband (soon to be ex-husband) would not work the last 1.5 years of our marriage. Although of course he swore he was looking and just couldn’t find anything “because of the economy”. Once we split up and he was on his own. The longest he has been able to stay employed at a time is about 30 days. Of course, it is never his fault and he can’t seem to understand why this keeps happening to him.

    Best of luck to you on the insurance issue. You know with a person like that, you have to find a way to rely solely on yourself. Hopefully, you also know that you have the moral support of those of us who are NPD Survivors with you.

  7. I hope you can get them covered elsewhere quickly! I should hope that with his record of job hopping the courts would grant you a modification so you insure them and he has to pay. Not that he would willingly pay it but it would keep his arrears going up and maybe eventually you would get it!

  8. Mine is self employed and I never know if I will get the support or not, or how much, because he pays what he feels like, not what the court order states, haven’t received Feb, and found out today my daycare costs are going up $480.00 a month, fun fun…

  9. First let me say im so sorry about that.. investigate the insurance for he kids! healthly kids or medicaid.. i wish i could find some insureance for me, cheap. just for prescriptions. im so in need of my bioidential hormones! UGH.. every month that goes by without them, only gets worse. last week was rough for me as my narc ex had his atty fle bogus motion papers, i spent 2 days getting and typing up a response…OMG but again, i went to my endless supply of BIG GIRL PANTIES and sucked it up and dealt with it.. glad those bgp are free!! thoughts and prayers for you and the girls.
    girl power!!

  10. I’m dealing with the same issue. Therapy especially is expensive! Because of the new Obama laws the states have to provide low cost health insurance for kids. In my state it’s about 30 a month. It takes awhile to apply. Use to be you could get insurance privately for kids for about 120, but the insurance won’t do kids insurance on their own anymore because of the new laws. You could also call a private insurance and get one for you with the kids but that maybe expensive. It’s frustrating because its our children and we should be able to depend on their fathers at least to provide insurance, better not to depend on an NPD for anything except admiring themselves in the mirror

  11. My decree includes a clause should insurance lapse, at which point he pays 100%

    Hoping yours has a safeguard? I’ve had to use mine several times (unfortunately)

  12. My husband can’t keep a job for longer than a year, his max seems to be 6 months now. Of course he hasn’t worked in 6 months and is saying he is, but can’t send his children money.
    Apply for medicaid for the kids and they should be able to get it. Sorry you have to deal with this. I know what it’s like to have to be w/out insurance.

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